How to Deal with Marrying into Debt

Today we have a lovely guest post from Ali Lawrence. Take it away Ali!

When my husband asked me to marry him, I was ecstatic! He was, and is, one of the funniest guys I know. His ability to make me laugh was one of the reasons I fell in love with him in the first place.

What wasn’t funny, though, was the amount of debt from school loans he was carrying around after college. And it wasn’t until we were married that I learned just how extensive that debt was.

I, on the other hand, had been incredibly lucky with school loans. Due to scholarships, grants, and my parents’ savings, I walked away from college without owing a dime. Though this was not exactly a “normal” occurrence for most students, I expected my husband’s debt to be a little closer to the national average, which is around $33,000.

But that wasn’t the case. Two years in community college and four at a university will do that, I guess.

Of course, I would have married him anyway, but to say that we haven’t had our share of challenges because of the debt would be not entirely true.

Here are six ways that we worked together to deal with the debt that I married into:

The One with the Debt Writes the Check

Paying this particular bill was rather painful for me, though I handled most of our finances. To ease my mind, I asked that he take care of this one. I think it helped him realize just how important it was to work hard at his job to make his expensive education worth it.

Accept It and Pay It Off Quickly

You know the saying, “what’s mine is yours?” Well, when you get married, that is really true. His debt became my debt, and rather than harping him about it, which I did for the first few months of our marriage, I learned that it was better for our relationship to accept it and move on.

Listen to the Experts

My husband and I watched Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University. This program helped us get on track financially. I highly recommend it to anyone in a similar circumstance. Through the class, we were able to properly set a budget that we could stick to, put money in savings, and create a timeline for getting out of debt.

Plan a “Debt-Free” Reward

It takes a lot of diligence and hard work to get financially fit, and the process can leave you drained. To help ease the process, we decided to plan a celebratory trip for when we were debt-free. This gave us something to look forward to and provided extra motivation to keep our finances in order so we could pay off our debt as quick as possible.

Look for Ways to Pay It Off Faster

Some careers, like certain ones in the military, government, or healthcare fields, provide financial assistance after you graduate to help pay off your debt. My sister-in-law became an RN, and the hospital she worked for agreed to pay off her debt when she signed a five-year contract. If you can take advantage of a program like this, do it!

Use This Experience to Plan for Your Future Family

My husband’s family didn’t really know much about scholarships and grants, or any of the other ways that you can pay for college without going into debt. We decided to use my husband’s student loan experience as a tool for planning for our own kids’ future tuition. Thinking about it and planning for it now will save them (and you) hardship in the future.

Though coming to terms with my husband’s debt was difficult, I really believe that it only strengthened our relationship. We learned, together, what it meant to build a budget and be disciplined enough to stick to it.

Marrying into debt doesn’t have to be the end of the world. With patience and perseverance, you and your spouse will navigate through it all and come out debt-free.

Ali Lawrence is a tea-sipping writer who focuses on healthy and sustainable living via her family blog, Homey Improvements. She was born and raised in Alaska and dabbles in PR, Pilates, and is a princess for hire for kid’s parties. You can also follow her on Twitter.

Like what you read? It’s your turn! We’ll pay you for your debt story.

Around here, we’re all about taking our debt and beating it down. Grrrrrrrr! We pay $5 for every awesome debt story we publish (whether you’re in debt, out of it, or barely living to tell the tale) so send yours our way to be considered: reddebtedstepchild[at]gmail[dot]com!

Let the awesome come to you. Give me your email and I’ll give you all my new posts -- win, win!

5 Minutes Saved Me $12

You know those (semi-annoying) Geico commercials? “15 minutes can save you 15% or more on car insurance.”

Well, I just saved $12 in 5 minutes, which is about 17% of my $70 purchase. So take that Geico!

When I got home from work last night, I let my dogs out in the backyard and then I went around to check the mail.

I always sort the mail as I walk back up the drive to my house so I can immediately throw away the spam mail and other trash so I can avoid having to declutter it later.

As I was sorting through the mail, I came across two postcard “checks” worth $12 each. These were from the mail-in rebate I filled out when I got my dogs’ heart worm medication for the year.

Heart worm medication is expensive, which is why most pet owners that use it only buy one box at a time for each of their pets. One box contains 6 doses for 6 months. But most hear worm medication companies offer a mail-in rebate discount if you buy a whole year’s supply at the same time.

Because I know I’m going to end up buying a whole year’s worth anyhow, I always buy a whole year’s worth for each dog when I go to the vet and then I submit 3 forms for 3 rebates (one/dog). I’ve never had a problem with this and all 3 checks usually arrive on the same day. But this time they didn’t.

After I got through the whole mail pile and saw that I was indeed 1 rebate check short I thought, “Well the post office has sucked at getting mail to its location lately, so maybe one of them is just delayed and I should wait patiently for it to arrive later.” (Yeah right, I’m not patient.)

Since I’m not patient, I decided to call and check on the 3rd check. I grabbed the photo copy I had made of all 3 filled out rebate forms to find the phone number. The customer service phone number wasn’t on the form nor was it on one of the checks I got in the mail.

I almost gave up right then, but I decided to do a quick internet search to see if I could turn it up. Luckily, it was easy to find on the internet so I gave them a call.

After only 2-3 minutes on the phone, the representative got the problem fixed and said my 3rd rebate check should be here in about 2 weeks. (Apparently their system had only registered 2 of my 3 rebate forms.)

Waalaa! I saved $12 in 5 minutes. Eat your heart out Geico! :)

When’s the last time you saved money on something so simple? When’s the last time you decided not to put forth the effort?


Stepchild Faves – February 2015

Hey, hey! It's already the last Friday of February, which means it's time for a new edition of Stepchild Faves. :) I don't know what's going on in your part of the country, but here in my part of the world it's supposed to snow - big-time - this … Continue reading...

Financial Implications of Being Sick

It's just that time of year I guess. Between colds, stomach bugs, being miserable with allergies, and strep throat, lots of illnesses have been making their rounds through my group of friends, my family, and my co-workers at both of my … Continue reading...

World War on Debt

Sorry for the delay in posting this week. We were having some technical difficulties earlier this week. The other day I was adding up some numbers to do a mid-month budget check and I was surprised to see my numbers. Subconsciously I knew that I … Continue reading...

December/January Blog Income Update

I totally fell behind a little bit and forgot to update y'all on my December and January blog income and expenses. But, I'm here to remedy that now! The numbers below are actually December and January combined - a far cry from our awesome month in … Continue reading...

Keeping Lifestyle Inflation Under Control

At the end of each calendar year, my full-time employer reviews our performance and decides if we deserve a raise, and if so how much we should get. They are willing to consider our input as far as what we feel that we've accomplished, things we need … Continue reading...

Making Sense of the ACA Act

Health care has been a hot topic around the web and in the news lately thanks to all the health care changes from the Affordable Care Act (aka Obamacare). While I’ve been lucky in that my health insurance hasn’t changed (other than some increase in … Continue reading...

How to Create a Successful Life on a Tiny Budget

Today we have a guest post from Deborah Shelby. Enjoy! Six and a half years ago, after a failed marriage, my children and I were living in a low-income apartment. After having been a stay-at-home mom for a few years, I had re-entered the business … Continue reading...

Get Your Valentine a Gift for Less


This post was created in partnership with Groupon Coupons. While some people may consider couponing dangerous for your wallet, as long as you don’t get carried away with it, coupons can be an incredible resource. If you’re equipped with enough … Continue reading...